Madeleine McAdam has a simple piece of relationship advice: check the phone. The TikTok creator posted a video titled “leave no stone unturned,” with the caption “DIG through their phone.” Her message is blunt, repetitive and, in her own words, entirely justified. “It is literally for our safety,” she says.
The video drew a strong reaction online, with commenters split between those who agree and those who warn that digging through a partner’s device can backfire badly.
McAdam’s Case For Digging
McAdam’s argument is straightforward. She wants people to look closely at their partner’s phone, to check every app, every message, every email. She repeats the advice throughout the clip, telling viewers they “1,000% should” do it. She also adds a touch of theatrics, telling them to grab “a shovel and a pail” and inspect the device. She wants people to check “every nook and cranny.”
She is not vague about why. She says people should investigate apps they might normally ignore, and she points to anything that could reveal “something sketchy.” Her final justification is safety. “It is literally for our safety,” she says.
The Warning From Commenters
Not everyone agreed. One user responded with a blunt warning: “99.5% of you are going to find something you wish you hadn’t.” They added, “I’d recommend just not looking.” Another commenter pushed the caution further, framing the act as a step that should only be taken by people prepared to end the relationship entirely.
“DO NOT DO THIS UNTIL YOU ARE PREPARED TO WALK AWAY FROM THE RELATIONSHIP!!” the user wrote. The warning carries weight because it treats phone-checking as a decision with real consequences, not a casual curiosity.
A second comment described a longer investigation. The user said they checked their partner’s phone repeatedly and still missed something. They found “a singular email” from years earlier after three years together. The experience showed how thorough a search can become, and how easy it is to miss something.
Where To Look On The Phone
Some viewers offered specific tips for people who want to dig. One person suggested checking battery settings to see which apps consume the most power. They also recommended checking the App Store for apps missing from the device. “You’ll see if they’re deleting and redownloading,” the user claimed.
Another user pointed viewers toward Screen Time. “Go on screen time it’ll show what websites he’s been on and for how long xx,” they wrote. That comment shifted the conversation toward detailed digital investigation.
Privacy As A Question
Not everyone saw phone access as an automatic relationship violation. One commenter questioned why people objected to checking a partner’s phone. “If you have nothing to hide, then why is it a problem?” they asked. The response captured a different view of digital privacy. The user connected phone access with openness and trust.
The Daily Dot was unable to independently verify the personal experiences described by commenters in this video. The details above reflect the account shared on TikTok by @madeleinemcadam and the comments on that post.
The Divide Among Commenters
The video’s comments show a clear split. Some users urged people to avoid looking unless they could handle what they might find. Others argued that partners should not treat their phones as completely private spaces. The disagreement is real, and it cuts to what people expect from each other in a relationship.
| Commenter | View | Detail |
|---|---|---|
| User 1 | Don’t look | “99.5% of you are going to find something you wish you hadn’t” |
| User 2 | Prepared to walk away | “DO NOT DO THIS UNTIL YOU ARE PREPARED TO WALK AWAY FROM THE RELATIONSHIP!!” |
| User 3 | Missed something | Found “a singular email” from years earlier after three years together |
What This Video Shows About Relationships
Commenters took the video in different directions. Some treated phone-checking as a necessary investigation, offering tips on which settings to check and what signs to watch for. Others treated it as a dangerous move, warning that finding something troubling could break up a relationship entirely.
One user framed phone access as a test of trust, while another framed it as a path to discovering something better left unknown. The video brought both views into the open at once.
The Bottom Line
McAdam delivers her advice with confidence. She believes digging through a partner’s phone is a safety measure, and she says it again and again. Her followers responded with a mix of support and warning, showing that the practice divides opinion sharply.
The video’s comments show the split clearly, with some commenters urging caution and others treating phone access as a test of trust. The debate is not settling anywhere near the middle, and the video has made the question visible.
Source material: “‘99.5% of You Are Going to Find Something You Wish You Hadn’t’: Woman Says People Should Go Through Their Partner’s Phone,” The Daily Dot.
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