Vin Diesel Rides Horses Through War Zones in Babylon A.D., and Nothing Else

Vin Diesel rides a horse through a war zone in Babylon A.D., and the film spends the next hour and a half proving that it knows exactly what it wants to be: a loud, expensive action movie that doesn’t want to think. It fails to deliver even on that simple promise. Directed by Mathieu Kassovitz from a script he wrote with Éric Besnard, the film follows a mercenary named Toorop who takes a young woman named Aurora from Kyrgyzstan to New York City. Aurora has a secret that makes her valuable to everyone in the room, and the film spends almost no time explaining what that secret is beyond vague hints about her intelligence and her ability to sense danger.

The premise is thin. Gorsky, a wealthy Russian mobster, hires Toorop to bring Aurora to America. Along the way, they pick up Sister Rebeka, Aurora’s guardian, and dodge a group of mercenaries who claim to have been sent by Aurora’s supposedly dead father. The film treats Aurora as a plot device rather than a person, and her gifts are used to trigger set pieces rather than drive character. She can speak nineteen languages by age two, and she can sense danger, but the film never shows those gifts doing anything except setting off alarms.

Trailer, via Kris Van den Bosch.

Toorop’s Weapons and the Submarine

Toorop is a professional smuggler who has been deported to Eastern Europe, where he does mercenary jobs. He is an expert in advanced weaponry, hand-to-hand combat, tactics, and culinary skills, though the film rarely lets us see the latter in action. His job is to get Aurora to New York, and the film gives him a variety of weapons and a subdermally implanted UN passport to do it. The passport is a clever touch, but the film doesn’t use it.

The film’s biggest set piece comes on a submarine carrying refugees to Canada. To avoid satellite detection, the captain orders his crew to dive and shoots some of the refugees still trying to get on board. Aurora, furious at the loss of life, operates the 30-year-old submarine without training. It’s a moment that should feel tense, but the film cuts away before the tension can build.

The Betrayal That Never Arrives

Finn, a Russian smuggler and Toorop’s old associate, betrays the group. The film promises a betrayal, but it never delivers the payoff. Finn’s exit is abrupt, and the film moves on without giving the audience a reason to care. The drones that attack the group in Alaska are destroyed, but the scene is rushed, and the destruction feels hollow.

A Cast Wasted on a Bad Script

The cast is a problem. Vin Diesel is fine in the lead, playing a mercenary with a grim past and a professional demeanor. Mélanie Thierry plays Aurora, a young woman who has been given shelter by the Noelite nuns, and she is given almost nothing to do. Michelle Yeoh plays Sister Rebeka, a nun from an ascetic branch of the Noelites who became Aurora’s guardian after joining the order to escape an abusive relationship. Charlotte Rampling plays the High Priestess of the Noelite Church, a woman who does not care about the religion and seeks only power and wealth. She plans to use science to produce miracles to extend the popularity and reach of her church.

Lambert Wilson plays Dr. Arthur Darquandier, Aurora’s disabled father, who was presumed to be dead. David Belle plays Hacker Kid, the leader of Darquandier’s henchmen who follow Toorop and Aurora to America. Jérôme Le Banner plays Killa, an underground fighter. Gérard Depardieu plays Gorsky, a wealthy Russian mobster who hires Toorop to transport Aurora on behalf of the Noelite Church. He owns a private army and lives inside an APC fitted like a limo that is constantly surrounded by a convoy of his soldiers.

The casting is strong on paper. In practice, it’s wasted. The film doesn’t give anyone a chance to do more than walk through a set piece, and the performances suffer for it.

What Went Wrong

Kassovitz disowned the finished film, claiming that 20th Century Fox had interfered throughout production and that the film did not represent his intended vision. The interference is visible in the final product. The film is a mess of half-finished ideas, and the director’s vision is buried under a pile of explosions and gunfire.

The film was released in France on August 29, 2008, by StudioCanal. It grossed $72 million against a $60–70 million budget. That’s a failure by any measure, and it’s easy to see why. The film is a disaster from start to finish.

1. The premise is thin and never explained.
2. The betrayal that drives the plot never arrives.
3. The set pieces are rushed and hollow.
4. The cast is wasted on a bad script.

None of these problems are fixed by the film’s attempts to be stylish. The action is loud, but it’s not satisfying. The film is full of shots of Diesel riding horses through war zones, and the visuals are often striking, but the striking visuals don’t make up for the lack of substance underneath.

Babylon A.D. is a film that wanted to be a blockbuster and failed. It has everything a blockbuster should have — a charismatic lead, a globe-trotting adventure, a secret that everyone wants — and it fails to do anything with any of it. The film is a waste of talent, a waste of money, and a waste of time. It deserves a 0.7/10.

2008 films · action film · French cinema · movie review · Vin Diesel